Home sweet Colorado

Its nice to be back home. Don't get me wrong, the white sandy beaches in Clearwater are lovely this time of year. I simply prefer snow because if you get it down your pants, it just melts.

The ramblings of responsibility

flarida...

There’s nothing more lonesome than being misunderstood. There’s nothing more exciting than being all alone. My mind is becoming numb with superficial perfection. Its like they live in a Pottery Barn catalog!

So I deal with the situation by getting on the internet. Hmmm. What is this person up to? Nothing. Well, probably something. Most likely something that is much more intriguing than wasting time seeing what others are up to on the internet. Okay…what about this person. Apparently hanging out with a woman who has larger breasts than me. No problem. I have no time for that nonsense anyhow.

Tomorrow, after the sister-in-law and mother-in-law are done shopping, we are going to go to the beach. That should be fun.

I swear to god the key to life is being content no matter what the circumstances.

Never been to Florida before...

Its colder here than it is in Denver.

I missed two days of work and a day of school to make it to my brother’s for Thanksgiving.

“Hi brother, its your little sister. We just landed in Tampa.”
“I can’t talk right now. I am on a conference call. Call me back when you’re at baggage claim.”
“Okay. You’re still at work?”
“Can’t talk now.”

“Hi big brother, its your little sister. We just got our bag from baggage claim. Should we wait outside for you? Are you close to the airport?”
“No. Wait inside. I am just leaving work. I’m like 20 minutes from the airport. Don’t worry I’ll be there soon.”
“Okay.”

I ate pizza two nights in a row…mushroom and pineapple. I’m building my stomach up for tomorrow.

My sister-in-law told me she always thought I should be an artist. That made me feel really good. Then about 15 minutes later she called me a terrorist because I have a sticker on my computer of Bush’s head above a pair of crossbones. That made me feel sorry for her.

happy-day-o-thanks.

mmm...Turkish Delight

all the cool kids are doing it...

THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE

1 – finish school
2 – climb all the 14ers in CO
3 – fall in love
4 – have a baby
5 – own a scooter
6 – be a DJ
7 – learn how to telemark

THINGS I CANNOT DO (very well)

1 – sit still
2 – follow directions
3 – be alone
4 – handle large amounts of alcohol, coffee, or pot
5 – get to work on time
6 – understand philosophy
7 – tell jokes
8 - find a bra that fits


THINGS THAT ATTRACT ME TO THE OPPOSITE SEX

1 – extreme sports
2 – good taste in music
3 – the ability to dance
4 – brainiacs
5 – cheesy pick-up lines
6 – an unforgettable smile
7 – honesty

THINGS I SAY MOST OFTEN

1 – yes!
2 – hey dude.
3 – FANtastic!
4 – never-mind
5 – wanna go ride bikes???
6 – how do you manage your bladder


celeberty crushes

1 – Steven Hawking
2 – Jake Gyllenhaal
3 – Lexxy Saffron
4 – Scott Meyer
6 – Willy Warren
7 - Uma Thurman

I'm just a girl.

it is not productive to make generalizations about the sexes

Sunday Funday (part three)

Sunday consisted of baking a pie and listening to records at my big brother's house. Later in the evening I headed for the hills. Early this morning I was snowboarding in super snoochy cherry fresh pow pow nar nar. It was unbelievably delicious conditions for November.

Now I am stuck in Frisco. I-70 is closed.
I was supposed to go to school tonight.
I am supposed to be to work at 7AM tomorrow morning.


All I can do to pass the time is sit still and contemplate the outcome of my decisions.

If I had someone to love, I imagine life would become beautiful and comfortable, but curiously complicated. Since I am not in love, life is adventurous and bold, but dangerously careless. I don't know which is better, but life is not fun when the circumstances are forced.

Another term for intuition is critical thinking.

I’d like to be a mathematician. Re-learning math might come in handy just in case I have a kid one day and he or she needs help with long division. Or maybe I should re-take physics and concentrate more on understanding the basic principles and less on getting and “A” on my homework. As you can tell, I’m feeling a bit inadequate in the intelligence department… (and in the happy/funny department, and in the love department). I mean, Christ, even Forrest Gump is smarter than me. As least he knows what love is. I’ve got some pretty strong motivation to discontinue the practice of drinking heavily. My decision making skills are off and my selfishness is stupidity.

Somewhere in Mexico, there’s a poor fisherman that’s got it figured out. Retired before he even started, he’s never been to school or had to work a day in his life. Just sitting in a boat on a lake all day without a care in the world, he’s content.

I know what you’re thinking…

”See that girl over there, the young one who thinks she knows everything. Boy does she have egg on her face!”


This is my excuse: I’m beginning to have a fear of knives because I’ve been cut too many times. All these expectations, these responsibility, they’re messing with my head. Just because I’m cute doesn’t mean I don’t look like an ugly duckling. Just because I’m clever doesn’t mean I have a crystal ball that helps me make all the right choices. Just because I am health conscious doesn’t mean I always shop at Whole Foods.

When I start to think that any part of me is superior to any part of someone else, then the world becomes my whore and me its pimp. But don’t give up on me just yet. I am trying to hold out for the beautiful metaphors, but if I leave the party early without saying “good bye”, I promise I’ll make it up to you by bringing back a rock star.

the most beautiful metaphors

I'll be the grapes fermented,
bottled and served with the table set in my finest suit
like a perfect gentlemen











I'll be the fire escape that's bolted to the ancient brick
where you will sit and contemplate your day









I'll be the waterwings that save you if you start drowning
in an open tab when your judgement's on the brink









I'll be the phonograph that plays your favorite albums back as your lying there drifting off to sleep...



I'll be the platform shoes and undo what heredity's done to you...
you won't have to strain to look into my eyes










I'll be your winter coat buttoned and zippedstraight to the throat
with the collar up so you won't catch a cold

WARNING:

Be afraid.

There is currently a global epdemic of bird flu.

I am safe.

I received a phone messege early this morning (4:40AM). And I am confident that I'll be safe.

Hello, this is _________. Strangely enough, you know how I always talk about the Doom’s Day virus and what not? Well, my father, being the man he is, has bought me a plane…this guy has his jet in Denver, and I am going to fly back home, then go up to our place up in Michigan with all our property and what not. And I was wondering if you’d like to accompany me to that place right now because of what’s actually really going on right now. Maybe you didn’t know about it because my father is the man who he is. Just give me a call because I would love for you to be the person who came with me on this thing. Anyway, call me if you think this is something realistically…well anyways, just call me. Good night.

Those of you who do not have a place to hide from the virus, I wish you luck.