Who steals flowers?*

daisies
Originally uploaded by luccym33.

One would think that in the thirty-aught years since the advent of "flower power" the daisy would signify the timelessness of peace, love and good karma. Scott McKenzie sang to us "be sure to wear some flowers in your hair," and evidently some people in this world have taken the line far too literally. Times have undoubtedly changed. Flowers are no longer nice to look at. They are as corruptible as gold, and every bit as ripe for the taking.

It is, arguably, a natural human inclination to brighten one's home inside and out with flowers. This romantic whim struck me yesterday, so I purchased a few happy daisies to adorn my front lawn. Excited by the prospect of planting them today, I had left them out the night before in the hopes that it might rain, and awoke to find they had vanished.

My astonishment could only have been rivaled by my outrage. As one might guess, I asked myself, “Who steals flowers?”

In my more optimistic moments I try to imagine my flowers being stolen for benevolent reasons, e.g., to start an urban garden where funds – and hope – were depleted. I suppose I’m avoiding the harsher reality; Denver is rife with daisy pirates.

And so dear friends I say unto you: guard well your daisies. Let not their fair petals be usurped by foul hands!

*Disclaimer: I hired a professional to write this for me.